And how to stop being one Mood swings in menopause
In my early 50s I wrote:
“Cancer puts things into perspective, menopause deletes all. When it (menopause) hit me, it wiped everything away, there was no meaning, purpose, goal or reason to it all.
The problem with it is that you can’t take it out surgically like a malignant tumor.
It grabs you and holds on to you for years. The cure is time, but when Her Majesty Menopause has taken a grip of your sanity, you can’t imagine there will come a time she lets go.”
I know, a bit over-dramatic isn’t it?
This, in some ways, is what menopause does to you, it brings out the drama-big time. Small things grow into insurmountable obstacles, and tiny transgressions into unforgivable acts.
Apart from changing a few habits, one of the survival tactics is humor.
But! (and I start the sentence with a ‘but’ despite -and maybe in spite of -knowing that my resident language police and co-founder will be tearing her hair out) you have to be very careful who you share the joke about yourself with. Use it (humor) wisely!
Self-deprecating humor can be dangerous when it falls into the wrong hands!
As I said in the story of my “tragedy” with the crumbs, this kind of humor can potentially be held against you. My daughters asked me jokingly if I was in a perpetual state of PMS when I entered the years of mood swings and blistering hot flashes, aka perimenopause. Mood swings in menopause
They thought it was funny!
I really did not.
That kind of humor should be reserved for your friends who are in the same boat or restricted to your internal dialog. That way it can’t be turned against you or used inappropriately. Because beware! If not used appropriately, it may cause the Drama Queen to completely take over center-stage in all her splendor and overbearing personality.
Case in point: A few days ago, one of my beloved children did something unnecessary which I interpreted as a dagger to my heart. A small negative thought soon snowballed into an avalanche. Drama! I was hurting myself by allowing unfounded conclusions to dig deeper and wider into my brain as one thought caught up with another at the speed of light.
My self-righteousness was having a field day. Fortunately, I caught myself in time before disowning my own child.
Walk my talk
I reined in my thoughts and remembered that I should walk my own talk! If I aim to advise other women to control their thoughts, I should be the first one to do so. So, I did. I analyzed the situation and saw it for what it was — a gaffe, a faux pas on my kid’s part, nothing more.
My own postmenopausal Drama Queen did not get to rule the stage on that day. I turned the whole situation into a tragicomedy I could tell as a joke to my friends — the crowd that understands, the crowd that fully gets the menopausal humor, the experts by experience. Mood swings in menopause