Why should we trust those who say it will get better?
Life expectancy for women in the year 2040 is 83.3 years. That means that you have at least 30, maybe even 40 years or more, after menopause to live your life to the fullest and thrive.
Last week, our guest blogger from menopausalme.com gave her a view of what she was going through during menopause, calling it her MMM – Moody, Mad and Miserable.
When you are in the depth of that, sometimes difficult menopause experience, you don’t believe it will ever be over and that you will feel much better after it ends.
You are not alone. At the midpoint of menopause women experience:
a) hot flashes are in their full blazing strength (for 83% of you),
b) when you had maybe 8 hours of sleep in the past thre days altogether (for 95% of you),
c) your mood swings and irritability are at their highest point ever (for 87% of you),
d) when you are so forgetful that you think you are losing your mind or going into early dementia (95% of all women)
e) In addition to many more of the 47 symptoms attributed to menopause it is difficult to phantom a better time in the future.
We implore you to consider that it is possible.
Finding the light
In that pitch dark moment of the latest mood swing that pushed you towards despair and gloom, we want to show you that the light you are looking for is inside You.
If you give that speck of stardust you carried in yourself since you were wide-eyed girls dreaming of a beautiful life, there is a chance it might just grow into an even lovelier star that will shine brighter every way you go.
The self-care and TLC you need to give yourself will make your light glisten. You owe it to yourself to invest in your health so that you can have fun and enjoy this part of your life.
It does seem like a very long time
Menopause last 4-7 years on average. It does feel like it will never end but it does end for the majority of women. Only a very small percent report on having some of the menopausal symptoms for a longer time.
We know women who still have hot flashes in their 60s triggered by alcohol or coffee but they all report that they have long learned to live with them and not let them disrupt their lives like they used to.
Profound changes after menopause
The moment you transition into postmenopause, you have the chance to finish what you started during menopause and redefine who you are and what your priorities are.
For many women, these changes are deep and far-reaching. The realization that you have been holding yourself up to impossible standards is profoundly liberating. You allow yourself to do your best on any given day.
Some days your best is 100% and sometimes it is 1%. Now you show up for yourself and the people you want in your life, and not only for everybody else.
Toxic people erased
In postmenopause your light can shine even brighter, the more you let your true self emerge if it was hidden. When this happens you will have less tolerance for toxic people in your life.
Just like you can unfriend or unfollow someone on social media, you can also do it in real life. It is not easy but absolutely necessary. Nobody wants to waste their time on emotional and energetic vampires.
One of our posts says:
Having a “Why” after menopause
Many women quit their jobs to devote their time to a cause close to their hearts or to right a wrong they feel passionate about.
The two of us were really mad at the way women in menopause were treated as well as the lack of credible information normalizing this phase in life. We were appalled that the medical community is treating menopause as an illness as if something was wrong with us and not as a normal phase in every woman’s life.
(Of course, we are the first to advise you to see a doctor if the symptoms you are experiencing are severe and debilitating.)
Find joy, dance, and laugh
In postmenopause, your only job is to find the things that bring you joy and make your heart dance. You have already done all the rest that was expected of you – grown up, went to school, made home, and most likely raised a family. Most of you have cared for elderly parents or relatives.
Now it is time for you. Menopause is behind you. Leave it there but help other younger women, your sister, and your daughters go through it with less stress and pain. Help them normalize menopause by speaking up.
Pot of gold
There is a pot of gold on the other side of menopause. It is called the golden years for a reason. Live it, enjoy it and make the best part of your life!